Oh, the glory of the second trimester energy!! Right?? NOPE!
This mama suffered through the second trimester just about as much as the first! Minus the bleeding, that thankfully stopped in the beginning of trimester 2, the real work began with half the energy. All of the weeks of bedrest, sleep, being sick and weak, and still “momming” for three boys took everything out of me. I had nothing left to give anyone. But, as the statistics show, I knew I had a high chance of early delivery and time was short.
It was time to start making room on the outside of my body for the two-human addition to the household.
My house is not large, by any means. It’s a small, country home, built in the 1970’s and the lack of storage and excess space shows (or doesn’t show). So, I set to work on ideas that wouldn’t cost much and would be quick to completion. As a single mother, and in a pregnancy riddled with complications from day-one, finding a job for me was not happening. I turned to my Scentsy business to bring income to me and my boys, in addition to the MANY friends and some family who donated supplies, money, and manpower to get the renovations started.
We tore down walls, moved them, and built them back up. Ripped up floors to repair lots of long-lasting damage and preparing to lay new flooring. And, as the baby items began flowing in from my baby registry on Amazon.com via UPS, FedEx, and personal packages, I found myself with no place for anything yet! Piles and piles of boxes and packages have surrounded my bed in my bedroom for weeks!
As I have looked around my little home at the gifts that I, and the twins, have received, I have found myself overwhelmingly blessed by the many people who have supported me through this journey! I have cried tears of joy, frustration, exhaustion, and pure love over the past 30+ weeks of my life, and I feel that I am not done yet.
There were days when I felt like I could get up and conquer the world, starting with the piles of dishes and laundry that accumulated over the days when I was bedridden with sickness and/or exhaustion. Those days were not as many as the days I felt like my world was too big, too heavy, and too dark for me to see farther than the pregnant nose on my face. My hands and feet started swelling early on, earlier than the 20-week mark when they begin testing for preeclampsia.
I started feeling movement earlier with the twins than I did with any of my three previous pregnancies. Those were days I felt elated! With the bleeding scare of the first trimester, the movement was such a blessing!
I gained weight much faster, lost mobility sooner, and questioned if I was going to survive this time around more than once. I longed for the energy spike of the second trimester that my previous pregnancies blessed me with.
As the walls inside my house came down, I felt like the walls of my own resolve were crumbling as well. I slept a lot when my dad was here working. I was angry at myself and struggled with “Mom Guilt” for being in my bed so much.
And then, my boys stepped in! They started helping their Paw-Paw tear into the walls, toss the trash from inside and outside the house, and then finally restore the walls in their new places. The bedroom is bigger, making more room for the wee ones, and the main part of the house is more open than it was before!
At some point, near the end of the second trimester, I had a couple better days here and there. I was able to get up and do some things that needed to be done, schedule and keep appointments for myself and the boys (beyond my bi-weekly OB appointments), and even cook some awesome meals! I was excited! It didn’t matter that those days were few and distanced between, because this mother felt slightly human again!
The belly started popping WAY out, the feet continued to swell, and I drank so much water I felt like I was drowning in it after a while. My blood pressure has remained normal so there hasn’t been much concern for preeclampsia. That, in itself, has been a relief! It was my greatest fear after the sub-chorionic hemorrhage issue of the first trimester.
Now, another fear has made itself present in my pregnant life. The closing of the Labor and Delivery wing of the hospital I was to deliver at in July! It was announced in the beginning of May and caused quite the uproar among staff and patients alike. But for me, a woman who is currently on State Insurance because I am unemployed, I am bound to hospitals within my state. I live at the very edge of my state… in a small town where there is not a hospital that provides the services I need. The closest one was the one that closed their L&D. It’s 45 minutes from my home. The next-closest is another 15-20-minute drive depending on traffic.
Talk about a bundle of nerves!!! I’m carrying twins! I’ve had complications and have been labeled “high-risk” with possibility of pre-term labor! I’ve only had c-sections. The Dr doesn’t want me to go into labor, especially pre-term labor. And now, the closest “in-state” hospital I have is over an hour away! Just a tad nerve wrecking…
Of course, I’m no dummy. I understand an emergency could land me in a hospital in the neighboring state, hospitals which are only 15-20-minute drive from my house. But I will be seen by doctors who have never seen me, don’t know my history, and are going into an emergency situation with time constraints that will reduce their ability to gather all my information and look it over properly before doing what needs to be done. Fun times!
So, wrapping up the second trimester, I had fewer medical concerns which was uplifting. Yes, I had less energy than most in the second trimester, but those were minor issues compared to the other possibilities. Did I complain? Oh, yes! I was a grouch! I was angry that I was always tired and had so much to do. I was frustrated at my lack of energy. But I did overcome my moodiness and find myself good distractions most of the time. Crabby Becca was short-lived for the most part, minus a longer day here and there. I had my three musketeers to cheer me up nearly every time, too! I believe I am raising three comedians! There has been no shortage of corny knock-knock jokes, Yo-Mama jokes, and Bad-Dad jokes daily! It’s been a glorious journey!
So, here’s looking to trimester 3, with hopes, dreams, fears, nervousness, and I dare say, excitement! Bring it on baby!
