As far as I know thus far, two have tested positive in my household for Covid.
Now, as everyone knows, I have been trying to put together some other blog posts, which I will complete as I can and post accordingly, but I want to also share with you our Covid Journey.
Because everyone’s journey is different. Even if they are all in the same household!
So…
We do not know FOR SURE where we were exposed, and I will NOT say one place or another. We were simply exposed over the weekend last week. That is all.
Tuesday Levi complained of not feeling well at school (which is his norm anyway… school + Levi = sickness) *insert rolled eyes*.
Wednesday Micah was sent home from school with swollen tonsils.
Thursday neither of them were feeling well and were tested.
Friday: The results came in. Positive for Covid.
Saturday: the rest of the family was tested.
As far as symptoms…
Levi is the worst.
He has a nasty cough, no energy, low grade fever, can’t taste anything, can’t breathe all that great, and sleeps off and on all day and night.
Micah is already starting to feel better. But I am keeping an eye on him.
I feel… well… How can I even describe how I feel???
It’s a typical day for me with a little extra rough and yuck.
I have Fibromyalgia so I feel like I am having a flare up week with a little extra gross in between.
Yesterday (Saturday) Asher started acting like he might not be feeling well. Today he is about the same. No major changes thus far.
Rayne is great. She’s a beast! So is her carbon copy older brother Titus. Nothing there either.
In fact… let me share with you what Titus did last night!
So… we ALL know my kids are prone to the “interesting and odd” behaviors, and Titus is the firstborn, so he’s expected to lead in such things. Last night he did NOT disappoint!
He walked into the kitchen with a can of Lysol in his hand and said, “Hey mom. Wanna see how I protect myself from the rona?”
I turn from my dishes I was angrily washing at the time and said, “Uhm, Ok? What do you do?”
He proceeds to pop the cap off the Lysol, take a deep breath, close his eyes, and SPRAY IT ALL OVER HIMSELF from head to toe without missing a beat!!!
I stood in total shock, speechless, for a few seconds before shouting, “Titus! What are you doing?!?”
To which he cheerfully responded, “What? I’m making sure I don’t get it! Better safe than sorry!” Put the bottle on top of the fridge, turned on his heel, and skipped off through the house whistling a happy tune!
This is the point where I feel I must add that I AM NOT AN EXPERT PARENT! Hahaha!
So, other than Titus and his odd antics, the rest of us are doing decent thus far.
No fevers, no chills, and none of the “severe” Covid symptoms so far. Mostly the gross flu-like symptoms for everyone. And I hope that is the worst it gets.
We are treating our symptoms. Cough medicines, Motrin, Tylenol, all the vitamins and mineral supplements, LOTS OF WATER, some body armor drinks, Gatorade, orange juice, and so on. I’ve also made sure everyone spends some time in the sunlight outside as well. My hope is that we kick it together like the strong little tribe we have become over the past few years.
I must also add, before I end this post, that I am PROUD of my kids! They are troopers! They are strong! They have battled through so much in their young lives, and have come out on the other side as little warriors! And this Momma is super thrilled at the amazing abilities they have shown in the times of adversity and yuck. Every night when I lay in my bed I am beyond thankful for the blessings that are my kiddos! Gosh… I’m so blessed!
And with that, I will keep you all posted as we trudge through this, another of many tunnels we have endured, and how we fare through the yuck and gunk, and how we come out on the other side!
Something I have let slip by me in recent months has been my devotion times. Those moments, whether they be in the morning, afternoon, or late at night, when I can open my Bible or another book that is inspirational to me and bask in some positive thoughts and prayers.
I am happy to say that I have picked up the habit again, and it has been a glorious thing!
One, small scripture has been in my mind for weeks now and I just felt I needed to share with you all my thoughts on this one.
Whether you are a Christian or not… this is for you!
Philippians 4:8
“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”
In the past several months, I have seen and experienced many changes in life.
Ups and downs.
There were moments of great joys and moments of worry and stress. And sometimes, like many people do, I would lose myself in the lesser moments. The moments of worry, stress, pondering things of the past that are no longer relevant to my life or my family, and I would forget the things I SHOULD be thinking about.
And I have learned and known from experience, those things that we THINK about eventually become the things we SPEAK. Right?!
Which is why this verse is sooooo important!
I can vividly remember a time when my family was going through a struggle, when I was a teenager, and my mom would quote this verse at random, just walking around the house or even driving in the car. I didn’t memorize this verse for Bible drills as a child, or as a memory verse in Sunday School. No, I memorized this verse by hearing my mother quote it for a very, very long time. Almost daily.
When I had moments of frustration my mom would ask me if my thoughts were true, honest, pure, lovely, just, of good report, virtuous or praise-worthy, and I couldn’t tell you how many times I rolled my eyes so far, I’m shocked they never got stuck!
Fast forward to this past year…
I cannot tell you how many times I have caught myself, in moments of frustration with people, circumstances, and other things, thinking, “is this something that is TRUE? Is this HONEST? Is it PURE? Is this VIRTUOUS?… and if not, WHY am I letting it invade my thoughts rent-free?!”
Now let’s talk about my experiences with thought to word…
I went through some dark days several years ago, and they lasted quite some time. My thoughts were not positive. They were not happy. I was angry, bitter, hurt, lonely, and pretty much broken. I let the negative seep into my mind, and it eventually became how I spoke.
My words were not positive. My outlook on life was not positive. And with every negative thought that became words, it came full circle and made me even more miserable.
And then I found PEACE…
I cannot tell you when or where. I just know it happened. And it was a glorious thing!
With peace came the memories I had let myself forget. The times when I would hear my mother speak words of wisdom, peace, joy, love, kindness, and all things encouraging in times of struggle in her own life. How she was able to stand up and stay silent during times when crumbling and giving up during the battle was so tempting! I thought she was just being too nice, but she was building her heart and mind into something amazing!
And she was building it in me as well…
And so, here we are…
We have endured a Pandemic, lock-down, remote learning, remote working, NO working, wearing masks everywhere, not being able to gather as families and groups, and so much more!
People got sick.
People died.
People we know.
I have seen families fall apart.
I have seen people endure mental struggles they would have never otherwise experienced.
I have had to explain to my children why we couldn’t “go and do.”
We have endured struggles because of things beyond our control.
We have endured hardships.
I could go on and on about the things we have “suffered.”
But why???
Because it is so easy to fall victim of the one thing that captures our thoughts and words… the negative.
There’s another verse in the Bible that talks about our words. In Proverbs… “Death and life are in the power of the tongue…”
So, when we THINK the negative, we SPEAK the negative. And the negative kills.
I’m not talking about killing a person. I am talking about killing other things.
Negative kills joy.
It kills laughter.
It kills kindness.
It kills peace.
It kills love.
It kills our praise.
And it kills the spirit…
So let’s put a flip on it for a moment and see how it changes the outlook.
(We had a pandemic, and lock-down.)
I got to spend an entire year with my babies and experience every milestone!
(People got sick with Covid.)
Nobody in my family got ANY other virus all year!
(I didn’t have a job for a while.)
I got to spend all spring and summer in the garden with my grandmother who is 80 years old. We snapped beans, canned pickles, talked about tomatoes, peppers, flowers, and more!
(My children struggled with remote learning.)
My kids got to learn to drive tractors, hike, ride bikes and golf carts, fix broken things, install flooring, appliances, and bathroom things, and learned many family skills!
I got back to my roots!
I picked up books, my Bible, my journal, my notebooks, and my computer and I filled my heart and mind with the things that make me happy, stronger, more peaceful, and my spirit is happy.
Yes, I still have days and nights where I sit and wonder how I am going to do things on my own. I wonder when I will get enough sleep. I wonder how I will manage to spread myself a little thinner for all the things a single mother of five must do on the daily…
It’s been way too long since I have posted and shared my thoughts and words with you all!
Many blogs have been started, and none finished.
Life has been… just a little hectic.
We’ve been exposed to COVID in January (or February, I don’t even remember… it’s all running together now).
Sinus infections, allergies, the bathroom remodel, leaky water heater, car decides not to start, fevers, sleepless nights… I’m sure I’m leaving something out!
One thing got me this weekend though, and I didn’t even think of the impact until I told a friend about it this morning.
Sunday, I didn’t make it to church. The second week in a row.
Babies with fevers, and older kids trying to decide if their symptoms were of a contagious sort, or allergies… I was ragged.
I took a moment, after being smothered by one of the twins for constant cuddles and attention, to just step out my back door and breathe. I was standing in my back porch when my tiny grandmother walked in with her broom and dustpan. She saw me out there tossing boxes and whatnot in all my frustration (I was honestly throwing things to vent, not clean) and she figured I might need a little help cleaning out there. I had just laid the babies down for their nap and just wanted a moment of peace.
I was overwhelmed. Drained. Exhausted. Lonely…
In she walks with her broom taller than she, and says, “Well, where should I start?”
At first, I was frustrated. I won’t lie. I just wanted to sit down and mope about my circumstances. I just watched a live video of a church service I wanted to be present for in person. I had one child begging me not to make him go to school the next day and it wasn’t even 1pm Sunday afternoon. I was struggling. Deeply.
But I got up and showed her this TINY area that was “priority” to get cleaned and said we should start there.
“This is really where I wanted to clean up, and then I think I’ll go take a break while the babies sleep…”
Well… anyone who knows my grandma KNOWS she’s not going to settle for some little space.
Two hours later, ¾ of the back porch was cleaned, swept, and wiped down. I could feel the Fibro flare up wanting to start up almost immediately. I was completely drained. But… I felt good.
I didn’t feel great. But I felt GOOD… this was something I hadn’t felt in weeks! I looked around us, little Grandma with dustpan in hand and her other hand on her hip, observing a job mostly done.
A cleaned floor, washer and dryer both running with things that were being cleaned, and no more smell of clutter, trash, and yuck all around.
I didn’t take any pictures of this grand event, before or after, so there isn’t much to aid the visual for you wonderful readers today.
However!
Picture in your mind’s eye a mother drained. Torn. Sad. Angry. Isolated. Frustrated. Confused. Stressed, and just… done.
And then this tiny woman, 4 ft 9, marching in with purpose and with a single phrase inspiring motivation I didn’t even want in the moment… bringing just enough spunk with her into my house, she lifted me more than she will ever know. Regardless of how I express it to her.
It’s the little things that bring the biggest rewards.
I know this isn’t one of my longer posts, and it really doesn’t need to be tonight.
It’s a post of appreciation for an amazing woman in my life.
It’s a post to remind myself that I truly am most assuredly blessed beyond measure.
It’s a reminder that I can get through these long days, and longer nights. Through all the stress, exhaustion, frustration, and everything that weighs me down, I can get up. I can find my motivation again.
I see you, tired mama. Sad mama. Weary, worn, and burnt-out mama.
I see you… and I am praying for you!
We will rise. We will come from the tunnel that today has brought and bask in the light!
“Weeping may endure for the night… but joy comes in the morning!”
It would seem, my dear friends, that my world has been busier than I ever expected it to be…
When we last connected, I was working at a Domestic Violence Center in my community and enjoying every moment of it! I had also been offered a new job, a full-time job I didn’t tell anyone about at the time. I surprise I was not expecting to ever come my way!
As it stands now, I have been working with the state of Illinois since December 16, 2020, and I have been training on site and remotely from home off an on since that day.
When we last connect, my kids were only remotely learning, full-time, on their school facilitated laptop computers all over my house, every weekday, and driving me insane in the process! Ha!
Now, they are back in schools, half-days, four days a week, and one of them still has to log in remotely on Fridays to do any unfinished work, which he always seems to have these days.
Before Christmas, I was working evenings and only just began the transition to dayshift work for the state of Illinois, and the twins were home full-time as well.
I had my mom coming during the mornings, and my grandmother coming during the afternoons, to help alleviate the stress from all involved, for the working/schoolwork/childcare process. The twins were set to start daycare full-time, but weren’t able to begin until after the beginning of 2021…
And now they are in daycare.
They have been going to the daycare full-time since January 5, and after the first few days of crying, clinging, terrified wailings, heartbreak and mourning the transition has become much smoother and more bearable… oh, and the twins are doing fine, too! LOL!
OH! And thanks to the new job, I have also started the Dave Ramsey Baby Steps program, to eliminate debt, save money, and be able to provide for my babies and myself in ways I never could before!
This should be quite the journey, well worth documenting… when I am not asleep on my feet and able to write about it!
Everything from new jobs to in-person learning at school, daycare, and things changing around the home on a daily basis, this blogging momma has had a hard time keeping up with my own sleep schedule, let alone trying to type and post blogs along the way!
Since we last connected, Titus had just had his first driving experience in my Denali. He has not driven since… not that he or I don’t want to get out there and practice! NO! It’s just been so hectic around here that we haven’t been able to sit down and take a breath!
Has it really been nearly two months?! I remember that day being so warm… with my oldest behind the wheel, and my youngers in the back seat, antagonizing him and prodding him on to do things that both terrified us and made us laugh till we hurt!
We also did not set up any Christmas decorations this yes. I have babies… toddlers… there was just no way! Rayne would have toppled a tree faster than a family of cats and kittens playing tag in the branches in the middle of the night!
I enjoyed my house being free of decorations and whatnot this year anyway.
Now, let’s talk for a quick second about how the joys of change can quickly become the tragedy of stress and anxiety at the drop of a hat!
Just as soon as I got the new job, my car broke down, my dryer quit working, the water heater started leaking (again), and there were other things that required financial attention… immediately!
Christmas ONLY happened because some amazing people stepped up and helped out this year. My kids would have had nothing had it not been for some wonderful, huge hearted, amazing people in my life!!
Words cannot express enough the relief that I experienced with those surprise givings!!
But, as my mother so enthusiastically reminded me… My financial troubles began AFTER I had the finances to take care of it all myself!
WHAT?!
It’s true!!
AHHH!!!
I was able to pay for the repairs on my car, buy a tub for my bathroom (a LONG needed item), and I’ll be able to fix my dryer situation as well!
Oh. My. Word!
She’s RIGHT!!!
Was I stressed when things happened? Yep!
Did I have to borrow cars, and make riding arrangements for kids? Yep!
Was it frustrating in a ripple effect (from me to the kids to the people I had to borrow cars from)? Yep!
But is it over now? YEP!
That tunnel is behind me, and I’m preparing for the next one!
Changes are good.
Changes are stressful.
Changes are exciting, scary, intimidating, illuminating, frustrating, enjoyable, and full of so much potential!!
We are finally settling into a new routine with our most recent change. It’s a stressful, tiring, but exciting thing!
As we develop our own “new normal” I find myself at peace with the way things have turned out thus far.
It’s been a long time coming… this tunnel my little family was stumbling through was a long one. Dark, damp, a little creepy at times, and exhausting.
More tunnels will come.
But for the moment, we will bask in the light on this mountainside we are on. And for the next tunnel… I bought some flashlights! 😊
I can’t wait to share more with you all! Until the next time…
I have been on the Single-Parent journey for a while, now.
During the beginning of this chapter in my journey, I felt more chaos than peace. I cried more than I smiled. And I often wondered how I was going to be able to move forward.
And then, the healing that had already started, I finally began to feel!
The top three phrases I hear most often are, “You make it look so easy!” “I don’t know how you do it!” “You have the patience of a saint!”
My dears, it is definitely NOT easy, I have no idea how I do it on some days myself, and my children would not agree with the “patience of a saint” statement at all! Ha!
I have moments when the “Mom guilt” is strong. Moments when lose my temper, forget things (the laundry in the washer hates me the most), lose things, trip over myself walking down the hallway, and have lately been staring at the wall in my bedroom blankly, trying to figure out what I am even doing!
So, let’s talk a minute about when it all goes haywire…
I KNOW I am not alone when I say this year has been an overhaul of the unexpected, unpredictable (and predictable, sadly), unplanned, unprepared, and uncertainty! Times ten!
We, as parents and families, have been through the mill!
And the year keeps on giving…
I have five kiddos. Everyone who follows me knows this. Three of them are each in their own school right now.
My oldest is a freshman in high school.
My second son is in 8th grade (the junior high in our district).
My third son is in 4th grade at the elementary school.
All of them are in the same “blended learning” group. Group B. They attend their schools for a half day on Tuesday and Thursday every week.
All other days they are supposed to do online learning with their school-provided-chrome books.
Two of them have IEPs. Their classwork is set up differently than the third. And that one (the one without the IEP) is currently going through puberty… Jesus Help Me!
The twins were invited to join early headstart programming via “home-based-classrooms” and I was already set beyond my limit, so I declined that option for this year.
So where does it go haywire?
Well, it starts when there are medical appointments
Education appointments
Other appointments
Kids falling behind on their schoolwork
Begging not to have to go to school on their half days
Juggling all five of them plus the housework
The car acting up (again)
The fridge falling apart (again)
Mom’s business falling short on sales and losing income to cover the bills
Cabin fever
Sibling fights that go from verbal to physical in .25 seconds
Bedtime battles with the older kids (because the twins go to bed at the same time every night!)
Did I mention that this has become a daily issue? Like, this is not “every once in a while.” NO. This is current, real time, common struggle.
What I am describing is all within the past… few weeks.
And then comes Sunday… when the battle to attend church is in full swing. That battle begins on Saturday evening, typically.
But that is another blog post entirely for another day. And trust me, it’s a good one!
Now, where is the peace?
I’m so glad you asked!!
I want to share what I did when I laid the floor in my bedroom a couple months ago.
I sat on my floor and wrote Bible verses ALL OVER it!
I spent hours on the phone with my mom, going over the verses that fit my situation, me personally and me as a mother, my family, our lives, and the things we have been through. We talked and I wrote, all over the place!
The flooring underneath is covered in verse after verse about peace, joy, love, blessings, calm, grace, mercy, forgiveness, faith, miracles, and so much more!
One of my absolute favorites is Philippians 4:8
“Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy, think on these things.” (NKJV)
Some others I wrote are
“You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.” Isaiah 26:3
“Do not be overcome by evil but overcome evil with good.” Romans 12:21
“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” Psalms 147:3
“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Proverbs 15:1
“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6
“And He said unto me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness.’” 2 Corinthians 12:9
“He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength.” Isaiah 40:29
These are just a few of MANY verses I wrote all over my floor!
Why am I sharing this? Because this is where my peace comes from!
When it all goes nuts, I go to God! I go to Him in prayer, or in the Bible.
Now, I understand many people get their peace from many places. It can come from angry cleaning the house to your favorite angry music (I do this as well), or going for a walk, run, bike ride, or just getting out of the house for a bit alone. Peace can come from many places!
You all know me. Mine comes from my writing. And I look in many places for inspiration to write and encourage myself and all of you in your journeys as well.
There are days when I cannot find my peace by reading my Bible. Sometimes I’m not near it, sometimes I am not able to sit and read, and sometimes I can’t focus. Those days happen! Sometimes peace is hard to get a hold of.
And, of course, the Bible isn’t the only place I find peace. I find it playing with the twins. Playing my piano. Playing my favorite songs on my phone, or on the radio. Cooking food (chopping vegetables is a great stress reliever!)!
But when it all does go haywire, I have to find that peace! I have to settle my own head so I can settle what is going nuts around me.
My best suggestion to anyone is this:
In your moments when you are at peace, when the world isn’t chaos all around you, grab your notepad and pen and start to make a list. Make a list of the things that give you that smile, the calm feeling, the escape from the chaos. Plaster that thing on your fridge, mirror, anywhere you will see it every day, multiple times!
And when you are at a loss, remember Philippians 4:8! Think about the things that bring your smile, give you peace, fill you with joy and make you want to dance. Even if you cannot find the time to do something to calm you, you CAN think about the positive!
Yes. It is easier said than done. Until it becomes a habit. And a habit it can become!
I did it!
And if this scatterbrained, super busy, always distracted mama can do it, I KNOW you can, too!
If there is one thing that I KNOW I’m not going through alone, it is the return to school for my children during a pandemic.
Oh. My. Word!
Social Distancing, wearing masks, only going to school for two days, half days at that, and the rest online learning. It’s all part of a phrase I have come to loathe, personally: “The New Normal.”
Just, no.
It isn’t normal, new or otherwise, but it is an adjustment that we all have to deal with, one way or another, whether we like it or not.
Many people have chosen to homeschool their children this year. Many have waited for the day their children would return to the schools again.
For myself and my family, thus far, we are doing the “blended learning” program that our district has offered.
Why?
Because I NEED some time to myself (well, with the twins too), to get some things done, daily “office” type things, and my online work selling my glorious Scentsy stuffs! (Yes Lawd!)
And because my boys NEED to spend some time out of the house!
Cabin Fever was a thing, and a very intense thing, for a while this spring/summer! I prefer not to repeat the stress that came with that before the older boys went to their dad’s place for a time.
It continued while they were gone, for all of us.
Yes, Micah and I kept busy doing the remodel of the bedrooms, moving things, dumping things, organizing, and cleaning things, but we didn’t leave the house.
Titus and Levi did the bare minimum while with their father, because of the restrictions, and they were confined to their spaces there as well.
When they returned home, we got ready for school to begin.
Boy… was that fun! NOT!
Emails from the schools, parent surveys about remote learning and blended learning programs, the options for social distancing and if parents would comply or prefer to keep their children at home. The list goes on!
Do we buy school supplies, or do we buy computers?
Do we prepare for school attendance with extra laundry detergent, bleach, Clorox wipes, sanitizers, etc., or do we buy a deep freezer and stock up on extra food because we are about to have ALL our kids home all day, every day?
And then there’s the masks…
If the kids went to school, they would wear masks… the entire time!
Stress!
I paced my house, daily, looking at my space. I wondered if I would need to move things around to make more space for small desks or tables, get chairs for said desks, or if I should be buying backpacks and supplies.
I filled out the parent surveys, sent them in, and waited…
Then we got the notice that blended learning was optional, and so was full remote learning.
Uhm…
Yeah, my kids are going to school!
So, what is the schedule of the blended learning program our district has put together?
I’m so glad you asked!
My boys are in “group B” and attend on Tuesday and Thursday every week, from 8am to 12:30pm. The remainder of the week, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, they do online learning via the chromebook computers provided on loan by the district for the academic year.
We are currently in week four…
I still have my hair.
It is turning gray.
We have a wretched sleep schedule!
Online days are rough. Attendance days are not quite as rough.
I get some time to do bigger projects in the house while they are gone for a half day, and it feels good to have my time to dance with the broom, and sing into my kitchen utensils turned microphone while I clean them and put them away.
The twins enjoy my antics, and I am rewarded with many giggles, squeals, applause, and they are even starting to mimic my noises and behaviors. It’s gold!
Developing a functional routine in a blended learning environment has proven to be a challenge. It’s not at all the same, or as simple, as it is not consistent… yet.
It will be. It is just taking some time, adjustment, and more patience than I think I have at this time. Ha!
With all the computers, folders, papers, schedules, appointments, and that’s just the three older boys, I am a busy human!
I’m not sure when (or if) we will figure out a functional routine for this blended learning thing, but we are doing our best. Between me, three kids in school, two babies needing more and more active attention, and a house to keep up with, I’m a tired mama by the end of each day.
But! On the days when my checklist gets beyond the halfway point completed, I go to bed that night quite content! I make insane checklists for myself, and I keep thinking of more and more to add to them as the day goes on, so if I get through the parts that I created the night before I’m a happy camper!
But that’s a blog for another day. LOL!
Point is, we aren’t settled in a pattern yet. We may never be. And that’s okay. This is a year of crazy things, drastic changes, things beyond our control, and unexpected twists and turns all the way around. We haven’t been okay for months.!
It’s okay to not be okay.
That is something I cannot say enough.
I have been blessed with super resilient children. That is a blessing and a curse at the same time, because they learn to adapt to change, and some changes are not that great… but they adapt to them, and creating structure in the aftermath of such changes can be… difficult.
Because what is harder to kill than anything else?
Bad habits…
And THAT is also another blog for another day. LoL!
I would LOVE to hear your back to school stories. Your struggles, your victories, and the journey you are on with your children!
This is interactive! In so many ways!
I want to be there for you. I want to support you! And I would love your support and encouragement as well!
